A friend I’ve known since I was twelve and who I loved so incredibly much has just passed away.

It’s surreal. His smiley message on my uploaded graduation photo is STILL THERE. (And I never got around to replying to him and it *kills me*. Like, intellectually I know I couldn’t have known what would happen, but it eats at me.) It’s unreal. His Facebook profile just uploaded a horoscope. His Facebook profile will keep on uploading horoscopes and they will always be like knives from now on. I’ve ransacked my room looking for our high school pictures and I can’t find them and it is driving me crazy and I’m been panicking because what if they too are lost forever? (They can’t be.)

And his wake is too far away for me to attend (and I am also too fragile right now to travel) and even if I did go I would’t be able to get there in time for the funeral (oh god).

Also out of all our common friends back in high school, I think I was the closest to him, the one who loved him this hard. We’d sort of adopted each other when he was thirteen and I was twelve and  we were away at school and unexpected neighbors and he didn’t give a shit about me being all loner-like, he was just fast friends with the ‘weird’ bookish girl in the boarding house and also the sky was blue. I mean, our friendship was like that from the moment it started. Like it was just a fact of living.

((And I sort of resent the high school friends we both had in common. I’ve messaged them and they seem not to know what to say and I feel like ‘why didn’t you love him this hard too, why can’t you be as devastated as I am’? And of course that’s an irrational thought and that I am being  unfair to my other old friends  and irrationally looking for someone with the ‘right’ thing to say. But I feel cut adrift, at not having someone to feel devastated with. God I feel selfish and terrible.))

I’m sorry this is all a messy mess suddenly popping up on your walls.  I didn’t know what else to do:  this has come spilling out after a day’s worth of crying jags and unposted Facebook posts. But I’m just asking—if you can, please do include me and my friend in your thoughts and/or prayers (if you pray). Please.

admiralwithoutships:

Fancast meme: Firefly → 1 of 8 alternate universe premises

1920s - “So, what are we doing?” “Crime!”

After fighting in the trenches of the Great War, Malcolm Reynolds and Zoe Washburne open a restaurant in Manhattan. Serenity’s a bit dingy and a lot disreputable-looking, but it is a front for a speakeasy and other not-so-legal enterprises. Jayne Cobb’s intimidatin’ person makes public relations a breeze, and no one on the East Coast is half the getaway driver Hoban “Wash” Washburne is. Kaylee Frye’s young, but she’s a genius when comes to keeping Serenity running. Good thing too, no one else has a clue how restaurants and speakeasies work. Inara Serra lends the operation some respectability. Can’t be too bad a place if you’ve got a talented jazz singer, right? Things get a little complicated when the Tam siblings come crashing through with the Bureau of Investigation hot on their heels. Simon gave up a glittering surgical career to break River out of a fancy government-funded boarding school upstate. He says they were messing with her mind. Whether or not that’s true, she’s definitely a bit in the way of Zelda Fitzgerald. It’s a heap of trouble, but the crew doesn’t have to explain gunshot wounds to nosy nurses anymore. For some reason, Derrial Book’s hanging around, and he knows an awful lot about shady folk and their ways for a pastor. Not much they can do about that: the guy’s a real help. Still, it ain’t easy. Plans never go smooth and it’s a bit too easy to catch a bullet between the eyes, especially when everyone in town thinks you’re a man of honor in a den of thieves. But at the end of the day, after they’ve outrun cops and outgunned competition, they still got Serenity. It ain’t much, but it’s enough.

ladygraceling:

Giddon taking Bitterblue’s braids out

A bird may love a fish, but where would they live?

im-a-kittycat:

“So my amazing daughter, Emma, turned 5 last month, and I had been searching everywhere for new-creative inspiration for her 5yr pictures. I noticed quite a pattern of so many young girls dressing up as beautiful Disney Princesses, no matter where I looked 95% of the “ideas” were the “How to’s” of  how to dress your little girl like a Disney Princess…We chose 5 women (five amazing and strong women), as it was her 5th birthday but there are thousands of unbelievable women (and girls) who have beat the odds and fought (and still fight) for their equal rights all over the world”

 - Jaime Moore, Not Just a Girl

the-guardian-of-snow-days:

jolly-coalition-of-dancing:

milesjai:

ruoloc:

Nants ingonyama bagithi baba  [There comes a lion]
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama         [Oh yes, it's a lion]

Nants ingonyama bagithi baba
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama
Ingonyama

I FINALLY KNOW THE FUCKING WORDS

it’s so funny to see the translated words though because you think it’s like some really profound chanting and really it’s just

yup

that’s a lion

this movie’s about a lion

just reassuring you that yes indeed lions are here

princessaryastark:

Winter is coming, warned the Stark words, and truly it had come for them with a vengeance. ~A Storm of Swords~